Saturday, May 9, 2009

Back to Square One

Graduating from one of the Top Universities of the Country, I have always been positive and confident that I would land myself on a very prosperous career path. That has always been my defense everytime my parents would open up talks regarding our future migration to the U.S. I always say that I don't see the reason for leaving, as I know that my future will be bright here in the Philippines. I try to persuade them and tell them of all my dreams and ambitions for myself and for our family.

I had high ambitions for myself. And these ambitions of mine sometimes lead me to undermining certain jobs which I find too mediocre for me to take on. I know. How dare I judge? I have always been quick to judge when it comes to job applications. When I see that the workplace of a certain company looks distasteful, my desire to continue my application with that company quickly goes away.

Maybe more determination is what I need. I want to be faced with more reasons to work, and I think I have found these reasons. Just this week, I found out that my "chance" for Med School has poofed. My name was not included in the list of wait-listed applicants. Now why am I affected even if I really don't want to go to Med School? Well I think it's because I know that I will be disappointing a lot of my relatives, as they want me to enter Med School. Secondly, maybe because I still think that studying is more fun than working simply because you don't have to worry of earning money for yourself or your family. Third, a profession in the Field of Medicine will surely give me a wonderful life -- all that wealth, prestige, and good reputation.

Well, that's God's Will. I should just accept that. Disappointments are never uncommon, anyway.

Yes, I am back to square one. With my career options narrowed down, re-thinking must be done again. And I am now considering these jobs which I didn't imagine myself in. I hate being judged for things that I do or in this case, the job that I might be having. But what the heck? It's a job, and it's offered by a very stable and prestigious company. Being choosy is just not what I need to be right now.

Things are still uncertain. I have yet to attend the interview. We'll see from there.